Writing

I have gone back and forth on what to choose as my major course of study throughout my time at Biola. The problem is that I don't know what I want to do. It is begining to become a bit clearer. I spent the sum of my time directly out of high school learning first hand the concept that God can use an uneducated person. So, I suppose this relates to my previous dream of starting an orphanage. While I am not sure what exactly is to become of this dream I am certain that God can accomplish this apart from my education. I am not sure if this dream has been put to death or just laid to slumber. when I see the faces of the children my heart still breaks. However, God has made one thing clear... He is faithful to them apart from me. He does not need me.
The second option for my major was english with an emphasis on writing. I enjoy writing; I love stories. I fear that if I studied this I would no longer enjoy the past time. That what was once a pleasure will become work. I dread the thought of loosing a passion to a demand.
I do know however, that writing has been something I have also dreamed of. I suppose I dream of a lot of things. Perhaps I am one who can attend university for the rest of my life. I never want to stop learning. I wish not only to write, but be able to write my own work in multiple languages. Not for the title nor the accomplishment... While the blood of a martyr affects the generation at hand it is the telling of the story that keeps the very passion of the martyr alive and therefore affecting the generations to come, forever. I wish to affect each generation in a passionate way. That my writing might have cause. That the cause for which I write might create an affect that resounds for eternity.
So, I suppose that I have decided what I want to study. Hm, go figure.